Ok, not throwing. Shoving, punching, kicking…? Throwing just sounds better for a title.

I bought a heavy bag today. 100 pounder. Stopped at the hardware store after that and got some hardware to hang it, got home and got it hung up. I then proceeded to pound the heck out of it for 20+ minutes. There are a couple spots in it that are MUCH harder than others.

I *almost* bought a 70# one at Fleet Farm yesterday. It was $69, but lucky for me it was out of stock. Power went out at work today just before 3:00. By 3:30 it was obvious it wasn’t coming back any time soon, so I left and stopped at Sports Authority to see what they had. There was an 80# bag for $69..and next to it was a similar bag… lil bigger, and black instead of white. Everlast brand… the tag above it said $89… but the description said something about a rack…?

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Yesterday was my five week (and a half) post-op check up. I’m officially down 40 pounds. Nurse had heard of the Bariatric Advantage site for supplements, recommended a few things.

Been biking a little… very little. 3.4 miles or so the last two nights. It’s hot out… but with the weight loss I had almost forgotten what it was like to sweat.

Been going topless the last few days. Not me, the jeep. It’s been beautiful out. Yesterday was a lil chilly in the morning, but by mid day… sweet.

I don’t think I could do a chin-up to save my life. I’m trying to start doing some push-ups though. My arms have always been… small, especially compared to the rest of me. They’re even smaller now. Nurse said guys start putting muscle back on pretty good after about 5-6 months. I’ll lose what I have left for hair, but maybe get some muscle back. I could probably live with that.

I’ve been anti-social when it comes to social media lately. I think I finally poted more ‘dents last night than I had in the last month.

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No… not of winter. Of waiting.

The psychologist finally submitted the paperwork to my surgeon last week and they called me Monday to let me know they have it all and will be contacting the insurance company for approval.

The nurse said it could take two-four weeks to hear back from them, at which point I’ll be able to get the surgery scheduled, and it’s typically a couple weeks for that. So I could be going under the knife by the end of April… or earlier (hopefully).

I have not been as focused on losing… I’ve lost more than enough to meet the pre-op requirements. I’m trying to focus on habits. Thinks like no drinking during meals, getting exercise, and just trying to make better decisions in eating.

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The year is almost to a close… and the last couple months have been… a heck of a ride.

I figured I’d jot a few notes on where things are at with the whole losing weight/considering surgery thing.

On the balance scale at the gym today I was 349, in shorts, socks, t-shirt. The fact that I could use the scale is a milestone… the thing only goes up to 350. The scale at home here has me at 344. Let’s be optimistic and use that one… which means I’m down 25 pounds since the day before Thanksgiving and 30 from my highest. And I’m starving.

Ok, maybe not starving. But it has been tough. Not that I thought it wouldn’t be… but… Well, I’ve been eating more than 1500 calories a day I’m sure. Maybe not every day… but I’ve tried a Cliff bar before working out the last couple days cause I feel almost weak from hunger otherwise. That’s an extra 200 calories right there. I made a pita bread pizza for dinner… but one wasn’t near enough… even two left me still hungry. That was with an ounce of turkey pepperoni, green onion, red pepper, tomato purée, and 2 oz of cheese. The only reason I could have two was I didn’t do any starch with breakfast this morning, so I had four portions left instead of just two.

So actually, today I was likely fairly close, maybe even under. But last Friday I broke. I went to a pizza place for their lunch buffet. About 5 slices of thin crust pizza and a large salad with plenty of French dressing. I’m sure that put me over the top in one sitting. But I left full.

Don’t get me wrong… it’s not all doom and gloom or anything. Last night I baked up a northern pike fillet that I baked with a crust of soy nut crumbs with a lil parmesan cheese, topped with a cucumber dill sauce, a side of cooked apples and some of my peppered green beans. I seem to have those about once a week…

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Some more miscellaneous updates.

I’ve gone to the gym every day since Saturday. They have a walking track, that’s all I did Saturday was walk. Four laps around the track, bout 150 steps each lap, took about 10 minutes. Then I had to take a break, my lower back would start to hurt. Five minutes off, then another four laps… another break… four more laps. Bout 30 minutes total. It’s a start, right?

The scale in the locker room only goes to 350. Does me no good. I was hoping to use the scale there to track my weight… but that’s what I need to get to .. and yea, I could keep checking till I get under that, but that doesn’t help me check my progress. Feh, got home and ordered a 440# scale off Amazon. Guess it won’t hurt to have one here at home. I don’t think I’ve ever owned a scale before… other than my 5# kitchen one.

Sunday… first 10 minutes on the track, then decided to do the treadmill. Two 10 minute sessions, half-mile each. So that puts me at walking a mile and a half each of those two days.

I was going to skip Monday… but decided not to, so had to go home and grab my bag and then go. Good thing it’s only bout a mile and a half from my house. Went back, decided to jump on the treadmill, made it five minutes and started feeling sore. The grab bars are just a bit too low for me, and for some reason I’m not quite coordinated enough to walk on there without holding on. Moved over to the recumbent bike and did two, ten minute rides on there. Couple miles each time I think.

Been doing pretty good on the meals. I don’t know if I’m keeping under 1500… according to what I put in the meal tracker at sparkpeople.com I am… but it just seems like … I dunno. The watered down Gatorade I drink probably adds a few calories, but less than 100 I would think. And I did have a treat the other day. I was cleaning out a cooler in the garage and found a Snickers bar in the lid compartment. Kinda frozen. I cut it in to four pieces (was a regular size bar), put three in a baggie in the freezer and ate one.

It was good.

It was really good.

But I only ate that one bit, the rest is still in the freezer. And I’ve been eating some snacks here and there. 100 Calorie packs of pretzels, fat-free pudding cups, LOTS of dill pickles. (hey… it’s only bout 15 calories!) And I’ve been trying to be creative with my meals. Tonight I marinated a portabella mushroom cap in some italian dressing, then broiled it. Then flipped it over, put a thin slice of onion, some feta crumbles, and some seasoning and broiled it some more. Yea, I probably shouldn’t have had the feta.. but it’s been in my fridge for over a month.. and I keep the portions to the 1oz, but since I was havint 3oz of steak… I kinda went over on my protein portions for today. Sliced up the left over steak I used and put it on a piece of “Not So Wheaty Bread” and did the same bit of feta and seasonings before broiling that too. Both were very good.

Oh yea… Monday I was with one of the sales guys at the gym (paid the first month and set up fees for my dad to join the gym) and decided to suck it up and ask someone at the gym if they had a larger scale. He showed me one in the personal trainer office. 364.8 – yea… if that’s in tune with the one I stepped on at the doctors last Wed, I’m down nearly five pounds… in as many days.

So…. if I can stick to eating 1500-2000 calories a day will I lose weight? Of course. Will I keep it off? I… don’t think so. I wouldn’t say I’m starving… but I am going hungry each day. I’m snacking at times of the day I wouldn’t normally… which may not be bad… but I’m not getting FULL with my meals. I think what’s going to keep me going for the next few months is that I have to put up with this as part of getting the surgery. The point of having such a surgery is so that when you eat these tiny amounts, you feel full and you stay feeling full until the next meal. I think I had two dill pickles and a sugar free fudgecicle on Sunday… cause I wasn’t feeling full ever. Yesterday wasn’t as bad… cause I was more distracted and busy at work.

Sure, it has been less than a week, but already I think I’m seeing better than just last week how WLS will help. Cause I am eating right… but I’m still hungry. So I know I can eat right, I’ve always known I can… but I am going to need help to eat less. Not sure there is any other way of getting around that. And it’s not like I am not drinking enough water. I drank about 10 cups just at work today. Another cup at the gym, cup of V8 before breakfast, and I’m sure I’ll go through another 2-3 cups before bed yet. And yes.. even tho it doesn’t effect me like it would post-op, I’ve stopped drinking with and for awhile after meals.

So to keep this working long haul, I think I need the right tool.